I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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