normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
