WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
and you fell through a lawn chair
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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