I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
do nipples grow back?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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