I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize