if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
