You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
It's blow job season.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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