Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Randomize
