...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize