If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Randomize
