you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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