the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Panties = found
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize