I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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