it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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