ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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