Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
