Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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