the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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