the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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