i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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