Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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