Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
My breasts were aching with rage.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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