I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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