Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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