At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
