yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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