I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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