talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Randomize
