I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
It's blow job season.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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