Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
