I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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