wat bout pragnant strippers??
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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