I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Randomize
