I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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