I'm jealous of your bromance
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
