just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
