I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Randomize
