Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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