I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
