It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Randomize
