Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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