those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
