Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
