new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
