I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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