Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
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