The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
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