You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
high people should be assigned attendants
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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