Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
