I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
whose ass print is on the piano?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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